I just got back from a trip to costa rica. I went down to work with kids and lead worship for a group. At night, I was able to process a little of what was going on and was able to write a few things down.
I prayed through psalm 40 everyday before we went out and asked God that I would see Jesus in the kid's eyes. I have been down to the mission countless times and I had never felt like this before...I couldn't leave Marcus, Dillon, Stephanie, and Axel down there because I knew where they were going to sleep that night..I saw Jesus in their eyes and it tore me apart, and I knew that holding them during the day, singing songs, letting them paint my finger nails, just wasn't enough. I sat one day on the curb with all of the kids I mentioned above on my legs/knees and I just kept singing Jesus loves me in spanish...we didn't sing it all week, but I just knew these kids would know the song because we sing this song all the time in bajo tejares. They sang, and sang, and sang with me...It's simple. They know it...and believe it...they have nothing...yet they know Him. They know the same Jesus I know and they have nothing. That was the hardest day to leave...I felt his presence in the lowest of the low and in that moment, everything made sense. This day I saw a glimpse of the Almighty in the faces of four dirty kids in Tejares.
Here are my writings...
Leaving on a plane to no where, far away from the trees where no one will ever reach me, finding me to where I flee.
This place of secluded serenity. I stand on solid ground: firm, unfiltered, Raw.
Take me away with you. This place we call home grows old, overgrown, stale.
Repeat...repeat. I'm sick of it. Give me something I can't digest. Throw something at me I can't carry 'cause I have a friend who can.
......
When our bodies become one.
When we connect on a level no one else will ever experience.
When love for the moment seems the only thing
we will ever need, I see You.
I experience grace, hope, faith, love, oneness, peace,
and for the moment everything is beautiful.
Is this why you are called, "Lover of my Soul?"
This intimacy with the Creator is achievable.
One must first submit as lovers submit to one another,
become selfless,
then you will achieve intimacy with the Creator.
- captain